Biwi banate samay Bhagwan ne kaha-
Achi aur Smajhdaar biwi Duniya k har kone me milegi
AUR FIR
BHAGWAN NE DUNIYA GOL BANA DI
Ab Dhoond lo kona

2 Judwa Bachche...
.
.
.
1st Hans ke Lot Pot ho raha tha...
.
.
2nd Udaas tha...
.
.
Dad: Tum itna kyun Hans rahe ho...
.
.
Son: Mummy ne itni thand mein...
dono bar isi ko Nehla Diya.. 

dulha:molvi saab aapki fee?
molvi:biwi ki khubsurti k mutabiq de do..

dulha 10rs. dekr jane lga.
hawa se dulhan ka naqab udh gya..

molvi:miya baki paise to le lo......:D:D:D 

Gabbar - Are o Sambha kitane aadmi the?

Sambha- Pata nahi Sarkar mai to Ladkiya dekh raha tha

A Paksitani Boy Got Admission In An American School.
Teacher : Whats Your Name ?

Boy : Ahmad
Teacher : No, Now You R In America Your Name Is Johny From Today.

Boy Went Home.
Mom Asked: How Was The Day Ahmad.
Boy : Im An American Now Call Me Johnny.
Mom & Dad Both Got Offended And Beat Him Up.

Next Day He Was Back To School, All Bruised.
Teacher :What Happend Johnny?

Boy : Ma'am, Just 4 Hours After I Became American,
I Was Attacked By Two Pakistanis :P 

Lovers decided to commit Suicide...
boy jumped first..:(
Girl didnt jump:-/

From that day started the concept of
.


Ladies First.. ;)

KID :- Why some of ur hair are
white dad ?

DAD : - Every time a son make his dad
unhappy ,
one of his father's hair turns white .....

... ... KID :- Now understand why
grandpa's hairs are all white...

Girl - which computer do u have?

Boy - I have a computer with intel core i7 processor at 3.3 ghz, windows 7, 64 bit, 8gb ram & nvidia gtx 560 graphics card B-) 

Boy - Which computer do YOU have???

Girl - A PINK ONE !!!! ...::D :D :D 

Banta: Yeh chaaku kyun ubaal rahe ho?

Santa: Suicide karne ke liye


Banta: Toh phir ubalne kyu, kya zaroorat hai?

Santa: Kahin infection na ho jaaye!

Pathan ko dost ne khanay pe bulaya.
Pathan jab dost ke ghar aaya toh ghar pe tala laga tha,
Aur likha tha maine bewaqoof banaya tumko.
Pathan ne Hoshiyari dikhai or niche likh diya,
“Main toh aaya hi nahi tha”

AAP aur PEPSI may 3 cheezain same hain.
1. Sab ko pasand ho,
2. Dono sweet ho Aur,
3. Dono me dimaag ki jagah dhakkan laga hai.

Teacher:Agar tum apni ammi ko MUM kahoge to
apni ammi se badi aur chhoti khala ko kya kahoge.
Sardar:Teacher Badi wali ko ~maxiMUM~
aur Chhoti wali ko ~miniMUM~.

Sardar apna mobile
Qabristan main dfna rha tha
.
Major Rohail:
Sardar G Ye kya kr rhe ho?
.
Sardar:
Yaar dukan wale ne kha hai k
Mobile "DEAD" ho gya hai

Girl To Her Boy Friend :
Darling, Do You Know,
Handsome n Smart Boys Always
Get Stupid Girl Friends ... !!!

Boy :
Thankx For The Compliment , Darling ...

Agr Mobile India Mai Bana Hota To Us Mai Ye Templates Hote: 1.Kutey Call Kr
2.Cigrete Lete Hue Aiyo
3.Yar Kisi Lakdi Ka No. Dede
4.Recharge Karade Kamine
5.Kuttey ! Kahan Mra Pada Hai
6.Gate P Aja Jaldi
7.Yar Meri Bandi Naraz Ho Gai Hai...

BEFORE MARRIAGE
Gf- Jaanu chaand kaha hai ?
Bf- Jaan , ek tum aur ek wo upar aasman me.
AFTER MARRIAGE
Gf- Jaanu chaand kaha hai ?
Bf- abe tera bheja fir gya hai kya, wo upar kya tera baap torch lekar khada hai.

teri dunia me koi gum na ho,
teri khushiya kabhi kam na ho,
bhagwan tujhe aisi item de,
jo agnipath ki chikni chameli se kam na ho!

A kanjoos boy fell in love wid kanjoos girl
Girl: jab dad so jayenge to main gali me sikka fek dungi, tum turantandr aa jana...
Lekin boy sikka fekne k 1 ghante baad aaya.
Girl: itni der q lga di?
Boy: wo main sikka dhund rha tha.
Girl- pagal wo to dhaaga baand k feka tha, wapas khich liya :):)

Full form of GIRL
G: Gossip mein sabse aage
I: Innocent sirf shakal se 
R: Rone ki automatic machine 
L: Ladaayi mein sabki maa.


Full Form Of. Boys?
B -Badmashiyo Me Sab Se Aage
O - Ullo0 Ki Tarah Raat Me Jage
Y - Yaari Nibhate Jaan Laga Ke
S - Shareef Sirf Maa Baap Ke Aage.

Pappu ki hui master se ladai…….
Master ne ki pappu ki pitai……….
Pappu ka garam hua khoon……….
Gaya kabristan or master ki,
photo taang ke likh diya…..
COMING SOON

Lady 2 bhikari-Maine tumhe kahin dekha he ?

Bhikari- Kya madam ! Kal hi to facebook pe
chatting

ki thi or aapne meri photo pe comment dia tha
.
. .
.
.
LOOKING SO SWEET :D

Bipasha Ko Ladka Hua Bilkul Kala. John Ne Kaha:Tu gori, Main Gora ladka kaise kala? Bipasha replied: Tu hot, Main hot. Jal Gaya Sala.

Husband was singing in toilet:
"Kudiyan nu thag le,
Kudiyan nu thag le"...
Wife Shouted:
"Kaminey Pehle thik
se haag le!"

Doctor: Do exercise daily for good health...
.
.
.
Santa: Sir i play football, cricket, tennis daily...
.
.
.
Doctor: how long do you play?
.
.
.
Santa: until the battery in my mobile goes down!!!

Wife: Pori Dunya Me Chirag LeKar B DhundoGe To Mere Jesi Biwi Nai Milegi.
Husband: Tumhe KisNe Kaha K Dusri Bar B Tumhare Jesi He Dhundunga?

M-eri
A-atma
T-umhe
H-umesha
S-atayegi
-
Daro Mat Yar
Ye to Bas
*MATHS*
Ka fuLL Form H
Aj Hi Pata Chala
socha Bata Du.

Mai kabhi batlata nahi,
'Bar' me daily jata hu mein Maa
Yu to me dikhlata nhi,
'Daru' pee ke roz aata hu me maa
Tujhe sab hai pataaaa,
... hai na maa
Meri maa..
'Theke' par yu na chhodo mujhe,
Ghar lout ke bhi aa na paau maa
'Scotch' me itna peeta nahi,
... 'Beer' me seham jata hu me maa.
Chehre pe aane deta nahi,
Lekin kbhi bhi ludak jata hu me
maa..
Tujhe sab hai pataaaa, hai na
maa?

From the movie : "Bewde zameen
Par"